Why Does Existence Exist?

"Why does God make everything so mysterious?" That is how it started today when I wanted to sit down and study his Word.

Why does he make this life so mysterious? Why his Word? Why do we have to study, search, interpret, and try to find out what he even wants to say to us?

Why doesn't he just come down and show himself to us? Or rather: He did that, but why was he visible for such a short time?

Why do we have to puzzle over whether he exists at all, what he wants, and which interpretation of his Word is the right one?

And while we are asking these questions: Why are we even here at all?

On this earth. In this life.

What for?

Of course, I can answer this question from my Christian faith. For example, by saying that we are here to do our part in God's plan of salvation, to reflect him, and to take part in what God has planned for his creation.

And I think if you just ask about the meaning of our existence and reach an answer like that, you have already gone quite deep in your thoughts.

But for me, it does not stop there.

Because even when I have this answer, I ask myself:

Why is there a plan of salvation at all?

Why is there a humanity at all that needs a plan of salvation?

All of this can still be explained well with theology.

Yet why is there the Bible? Why is there God's Word? Why is there this whole story of creation, sin, redemption, and eternity in the first place?

Why was humanity created at all? What did God want with it?

And even if I find theological answers to all these questions, I can still take one step further back.

Why is there a God at all who has a plan of salvation?

Why is there a creation at all for which such a plan exists?

Why is there existence at all?

Because even if I understand the purpose of something within this existence, that still does not explain to me why this existence is there in the first place.

And right there, it becomes so incredibly fascinating to me.

Because at some point, I am no longer asking why we humans are here.

Instead, I am asking why there is a "here" at all.

Why is there anything at all?

And if God created everything, where does God actually come from?

Why does God exist?

Who came up with this whole game in the first place?

God calls himself the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end.

But what does that actually mean?

Because when I think of a beginning, I automatically think of something that might have been before it. And when I think of an end, the question comes up of what comes after it.

But what was before the beginning, if God himself is the beginning?

And what is supposed to come after the end, if God himself is the end?

If God exists eternally, having neither a beginning nor an end, how can he be both the beginning and the end at the same time?

Or is the problem maybe that we are trying to understand something eternal with ideas that are tied to our sense of time?

And even if I look at all of this completely outside of Christian faith, and start with the Big Bang theory, I still end up at the very same point.

Where did the things that our universe developed from even come from in the first place?

Why was there this extremely hot and dense beginning? Why was there any energy at all? Why do the laws of nature exist? Where did the particles come from that formed later on?

And what was there before the Big Bang?

Or was there even a "before"?

Because if time itself began with the Big Bang, what does a beginning even mean when there was no time before it?

And even if science could explain one day how all of this began, the question still remains:

Why was there anything at all that could begin or develop?

Why do the conditions for it even exist?

In my thoughts, I always end up back at something that has no beginning itself. Something eternal. Something that did not come from anything else.

Because of my Christian faith, I naturally think of God, and I believe that too.

But then that one question comes back:

Why does anything eternal exist in the first place?

And then my thoughts go even further.

Because what if there was no existence at all?

Imagine I move away from this world, away from the earth, away from all planets, stars, the sun, the moon, further and further out, into the black, into absolute nothingness.

And then there would just be nothing.

No world. No universe. No people. No planets. No stars. No sun. No moon.

Nothing.

But even when I imagine complete darkness, there is still something there.

Darkness. A space. An image in my mind. And someone who sees this darkness.

Absolute nothingness would not even have these things.

It would not be black. Not quiet. Not empty. Not boring.

It would not even be an "it".

And there would be no one who could be aware of this nothingness.

No consciousness. No senses. No thoughts.

Not even the possibility to notice that nothing exists.

And then I think to myself: Huh?

How could that even be possible?

How could there simply be NOTHING?

Not even death. Because there would be no life at all. No birth. No time in which anything happens.

Just nothing.

And at the same time, I ask myself: Why is there anything at all?

Why does this reality we are in right now exist?

Why do we exist?

And if God exists from eternity to eternity, then I ask myself: Why does this eternity exist in the first place?

Because if God is eternal, then something infinite exists.

But why?

Why can anything at all exist forever?

Why is there eternity? Why is there God? Why is there even the possibility of existence?

Because even if God is the origin of everything, the question still remains: why is there this origin in the first place?

And if God has always existed, why did he create anything at all?

Maybe he would have been bored otherwise. I don't know. But if there was no creation before, what does "before" even mean?

And if God is eternal and created time itself, what does a beginning even mean?

I find all of this incredibly fascinating.

We live here, go about our daily lives, and deal with our problems, our goals, and our future.

We try to find out who we are, what we should do, what God wants from us, and what the meaning of our life is.

But even if we found out all of that, one question would still remain for me:

Why is there any existence at all, in which all these questions, answers, tasks, and goals can even have a meaning?

Why is there reality at all?

Why is there eternity at all?

Why is there God at all?

And why is there anything at all, instead of just nothing?

I don't know.

But somehow, right now, I find it much more amazing that anything exists at all, than that all these things happen within this existence.

And maybe that is the question that fascinates me most right now:

Not what we exist for. But why anything exists at all that can exist.

And what I find most beautiful is: I don't know any of this. And yet, I can ask myself these questions with complete trust, in peace, love, and gratitude. Because I have God in my life. 🙏🏼🥰